Friday, July 29, 2016

Mercedes' 6th Birthday Letter

My Dear Sweet Mercedes,

6 years ago, you changed my world. 6 years ago, you made me a mom. For 6 years I have loved you more deeply than I ever thought possible. For 6 years, you have been my life. You and your sister and your soon to be little brother. But you started it all. You started me being a mom. You were the one that showed me it's possible to love another human being more than I love myself. You showed me that I would happily sacrifice any part of myself if that's what's best for you. You gave me the best purpose for my life, the best reason for waking up every day. You and your siblings. But it started with you.

Being the oldest means I made all my first parenting mistakes with you. I push you harder, expect more of you, ask more of you and have the least amount of fun time to spend with you. You have to share more, work harder, have more patience and more responsibility than any of your siblings will ever have to. I'm not doing it on purpose, I promise. From what I've heard, this is just life as an oldest child. Part of me feels guilty for not being able to raise all my children the exact same way. Part of me feels like being the oldest means you got the bad end of the deal. But then I see you. I watch you interact with your little sister. I see you becoming someone amazing. With a huge heart, tons of patience and a complete willingness to help me whenever I need you. You are responsible, thoughtful, kind, smart, a hard worker, and selfless beyond your age.  I have to think that maybe, maybe being the oldest is good for you. Maybe you are learning lessons that will turn you into an amazing human being. Lessons your siblings won't quite be able to learn in the same way as you can, as the oldest child.

You are truly turning into an incredible little person. I love to try to guess what you will end up doing when you grow up. Whatever it is, I bet it's going to be very creative and artistic. You love all things music. You love to sing, dance and you just requested (and will receive!) your first guitar and guitar lessons from Daddy for your birthday. You love to paint and color. Your new favorite hobby is adult coloring pages. You just completed one that took you three weeks! You have such a long attention span and patience for projects. You also love to bake and film baking videos, and to watch other people's baking videos online. You are also very active and into fitness. You love doing my workouts with me, especially yoga. You are getting so flexible and good at balance! You completed your first year as a part of Dazzler's Christian Dance Team and will start your second year in a few weeks. Over the summer you have been busy with gymnastics class, swimming and riding your bike with no training wheels!

You are beautiful inside and out and I'm so happy that you belong to me. I love being your mom. You make my job so easy and fun. I love you, sweet baby girl. Happy Birthday!

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